This is a profound story that can be easily told to the young ones. Remind your listeners that there is no one superior to another except in terms of taqwa (piety).

Allah says (transl.): “O mankind! We have created you from a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that you may know one another. Verily, the most honourable of you with Allah is that (believer) who has al-taqwa (i.e., is one of the muttaqoon/the pious). Verily, Allah is All-Knowing, All-Aware.” [al-Hujurat 49:13]

The Messenger of Allah also said in his famous sermon: “O people, your Lord is One and your father [i.e., Adam] is one. There is no superiority of the Arab over the non-Arab, or of the non-Arab over the Arab, or of the red over the black, or of the black over the red ““ except with regard to taqwa.” (Reported by Imam Ahmad)

The Leper, the Bald Man & the Blind Man

Narrated Abu Huraira, that he heard Rasulullah saying:

Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala willed to test three who were a leper, a blind man and a bald-headed man.

So, He sent them an angel who came to the leper and said, “What thing do you like most?” He replied, “Good color and good skin, for the people have a strong aversion to me.”

The angel touched him and his illness was cured, and he was given a good color and beautiful skin.

The angel asked him, “What kind of property do you like best?” He replied, “Camels (or cows).” (The narrator is in doubt, for either the leper or the bald-headed man demanded camels and the other demanded cows.) So he (i.e. the leper) was given a pregnant she-camel, and the angel said (to him), “May Allah bless you in it.”

The angel then went to the bald-headed man and said, “What thing do you like most?” He said, “I like good hair and wish to be cured of this disease, for the people feel repulsion for me.”

The angel touched him and his illness was cured, and he was given good hair. The angel asked (him), “What kind of property do you like best?” He replied, “Cows.” The angel gave him a pregnant cow and said, “May Allah bless you in it.”

The angel went to the blind man and asked, ‘What thing do you like best?’ He said, “(I like) that Allah may restore my eye-sight to me so that I may see the people.”

The angel touched his eyes and Allah gave him back his eye-sight. The angel asked him, “What kind of property do you like best?” He replied, “Sheep.” The angel gave him a pregnant sheep.

Afterwards, all the three pregnant animals gave birth to young ones, and multiplied and brought forth so much that one of the (three) men had a herd of camels filling a valley, and one had a herd of cows filling a valley, and one had a flock of sheep filling a valley.

Then the angel, disguised in the shape and appearance of a leper, went to the leper and said, “I am a poor man, who has lost all means of livelihood while on a journey. So none will satisfy my need except Allah and then you. In the Name of Him Who has given you such nice color and beautiful skin, and so much property, I ask you to give me a camel so that I may reach my destination.”

The man replied, “I have many obligations (so I cannot give you).”

The angel said, “I think I know you; were you not a leper to whom the people had a strong aversion? Were you not a poor man, and then Allah gave you (all this property)?”

He replied, “(This is all wrong), I got this property through inheritance from my fore-fathers.”

The angel said, “If you are telling a lie, then let Allah make you as you were before.”

Then the angel, disguised in the shape and appearance of a bald man, went to the bald man and said to him the same as he told the first one, and he too answered the same as the first one did. The angel said, “If you are telling a lie, then let Allah make you as you were before.”

The angel, disguised in the shape of a blind man, went to the blind man and said, “I am a poor man and a traveler, whose means of livelihood have been exhausted while on a journey. I have nobody to help me except Allah, and after Him, you yourself. I ask you in the Name of Him Who has given you back your eye-sight to give me a sheep, so that with its help, I may complete my journey.”

The man said, “No doubt, I was blind and Allah gave me back my eye-sight; I was poor and Allah made me rich; so take anything you wish from my property. By Allah, I will not stop you for taking anything (you need) of my property which you may take for Allah’s sake.” The angel replied, “Keep your property with you. You (i.e., the three men) have been tested and Allah is pleased with you and is angry with your two companions.”

A sister I know is expecting a second child. An ultrasound showed that the baby looked fine alhamdulillah and that in shaa Allah, she could look forward to another baby girl. The sister praised Allah and was overjoyed that no complications had been detected or were expected. She knew her husband too would be all smiles about the news.

When she left the ultrasound room, the sister headed for her mother and her first-born daughter who had accompanied her to the hospital. Her mother eagerly asked about the baby’s gender and when told, looked visibly disappointed. “Oh… another girl? Your husband will be quite disappointed. It would have been nice to have a boy this time, don’t you think?”

Her little 3-year-old on, the other hand, beamed and grinned quite excitedly when told that she would in shaa Allah have a baby sister. When asked if she knew of a name, she nodded and said gleefully, “We shall name her Khadija in shaa Allah!”

I have been thinking about the mother’s reaction and how she almost spoilt the joy of the sister.

If I could, I would tell her that her to emulate her 3-year-old grand-daughter who showed instant appreciation for Allah’s blessings.

If I could, I would tell her that daughters are gems.

If I could, I would tell her these ahadeeth from the Messenger of Allah s, which testify to the noble status of daughters…

`A’ishah radhiallahu `anha said: A woman came to me with her two daughters and asked me (for charity). She found that I had nothing except for a single date, which I gave to her. She took it and divided it between her two daughters, and did not eat any of it herself, then she got up and left with her daughters. The Prophet came in and I told him what had happened. He sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam said, “Whoever is tested with daughters and treats them well, they will be for him a shield against the Fire of Hell.” (Bukhari & Muslim)

According to another report narrated by Muslim from `A’ishah radhiallahu `anha, she said: A poor woman came to me carrying her two daughters. I gave her three dates to eat. She gave each child a date, and raised the third to her own mouth to eat it. Her daughters asked her to give it to them, so she split the date that she had wanted to eat between them. I was impressed by what she had done, and told the Messenger of Allah about it. He said, “Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala has decreed Paradise for her because of it,” or, “He has saved her from Hell because of it.”

Abu Hurayrah radhiallahu `anhu reported that the Prophet said: “Whoever has three daughters, and shelters them, bearing their joys and sorrows with patience, Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala will admit him to Paradise by virtue of his compassion towards them.” A man asked, “What if he has only two, O Messenger of Allah?” He said, “Even if they are only two.” Another man asked, “What if he has only one, O Messenger of Allah?” He said, “Even if he has only one.” (Ahmad)

Ibn `Abbas radhiallahu `anhu said: The Messenger of Allah said: “Whoever had a daughter born to him, and he did not bury her alive or humiliate her, and he did not prefer his son over her, Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala will admit him to Paradise because of her.” (al-Hakim)

Abu Sa`id al-Khudri radhiallahu `anhu said: “The Prophet said: ‘There is no-one who has three daughters, or three sisters, and he treats them well, but Allah subhanahu wa ta`ala will admit him to Paradise.'” (Bukhari)

The Prophet said: “There is no one among my ummah who has three daughters, or three sisters, and he supports them until they are grown up, but he will be with me in Paradise like this…” and he held up his index and middle fingers together. (At-Tabarani)

I read these ahadeeth yesterday and truly, they shamed me. How many times have I been in a hurry to complete my chores and placed my child last on my list of priorities? How many times have I forgotten to just STOP and BE THERE for my child?

Well, now is always a good time to change. Must go and colour some pictures with Marz!

And hey, give your kids a hug and kiss… just because, you hear?

• Anas radhiallahu `anhu said: “I have never seen a man more kind with children than the Prophet .” (Muslim) Anas also said: “The Prophet had the sharpest sense of humor with children.”
• The Prophet exhorted justice when he said: “Allah likes that you be just with your children as He likes that you be just among your own selves.” (Al-Daraqutni)
• It was reported from “`A’ishah that the Prophet kissed Al-Hassan and Al-Hussain, the sons of “˜Ali radhiallahu `anhu while Al-Aqra’ bin Habis Al-Taimi was in his audience. Al-Aqra’ said: “I have ten children, none of whom I have ever kissed.” The Prophet looked at him and said: “Those who do not show mercy to others will not be shown mercy.”
• “`A’ishah radhiallahu `anha narrated: A Bedouin came to the Messenger of Allah and said: “You kiss your children, while we do not kiss them.” The Messenger of Allah said: “I can not help that Allah has removed mercy from your heart.”
• It was reported by At-Tirmidhi and others on the authority of “`Abdullah bin Buraidah from his father (radhiallahu `anhuma) who said: I saw the Messenger of Allah while he was delivering a sermon. Al-Hassan and Al-Hussain radhiallahu `anhuma came wearing red garments and stumbling while walking. The Prophet descended Al Minbar (the pulpit) and carried them and put them in front of him. He then said: “Your property and children are only a trial. I saw these two boys stumbling in their walk and could not help stopping my sermon and raising them.”
• Al-Nasa’i and Al-Hakim narrated: While the Prophet was leading people in Prayer, Al-Hussain came and rode on his neck while he was prostrating himself. The Prophet prolonged prostration, until they (the worshipers) thought there was something wrong. When Prayer finished, the people said: “You prolonged prostration, O Messenger of Allah, until we thought that there was something wrong with you.” He replied: “My son rode on me i.e. rode on my back, and I disliked to disturb him until he satisfies himself (and gets down).”
• It was narrated in Al-Isabaah that “the Prophet was of the habit of playing with Al-Hassan and Al-Hussain radhiallahu `anhuma, walking on his hands and knees while they both clung to him from both sides, and saying to them: “What a good camel you have and what a good camel-riders you are.”
• It was narrated in Bukhari and Muslim after Anas radhiallahu `anhu that the Prophet said: “I enter into Prayer intending to prolong it, but when I hear a baby crying, I shorten it, as I know how his mother is anxious about his crying.”

Now that the time for my departure to Pakistan is drawing close, I find myself taking stock of the people here in Singapore who have made a big difference to me.

One of them is someone I will call Huda. When I first met her, I was a brash and hot-headed youth whose impulsive ways and tongue often landed myself and others in difficult situations. Huda was always calm and collected. I have not to this day, seen her lose her temper or speak ill of others unless justice demanded that she do so.

I remember, once, a group of us were annoyed with a colleague. Our discussion first started out with the intention of trying to rectify a problem that we suspected this person had caused, but shaytan took over and it descended into gheebah (backbiting). This person’s character was scrutinised and criticised all in the name of correcting a wrong. Huda grew silent as the conversation gained vicious momentum.

A few minutes later, we paused for salat ul Maghrib (the dusk prayer). Huda, I noticed, spent a longer time than usual after her prayer, making du`aa and dhikr. Then she rose and looked at the rest of us. She looked solemn and her voice was almost hushed when she spoke.

“You know,” she said gravely, “No one is ever really a hundred per cent bad. None of us are perfect so when we speak about others we should remember the person’s good qualities as well and not cut him up to pieces.”

We were overcome with shame and regret. We had felt ever so righteous but what had we really accomplished? We had done nothing but eaten the flesh of a fellow Muslim … may Allah forgive us, ameen.

Huda had taught me about the simple but often forgotten principle of giving others the benefit of the doubt.

Allah `azza wa jall says [translation]: “O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin. And do not spy or backbite each other. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother when dead? You would detest it. And fear Allah; indeed, Allah is Accepting of repentance and Merciful.” [Al-Hujurat 49:12]

Here we are commanded to avoid suspicion. We are to think well of our fellow Muslims as the tradition goes: “If you see something you do not like in your brother, try to find from one to seventy excuses for him. If you cannot find an excuse, say, ‘There might be an excuse but I do not know it.'”

Indeed, the religion is naseehah (sincere advice). Allah has told us, “The believers, men and women, are Awliyaa’ (helpers, supporters, friends, protectors) of one another; they enjoin (on the people) Al-Ma’roof and forbid (people) from Al-Munkar.” [at-Tawbah 9:71]

Also, “By Al-`Asr (the time). Verily, man is in loss, except those who believe and do righteous good deeds, and recommend one another to the truth and recommend one another to patience.” [al-`Asr 103:1-3]

Many of us, when we see a wrong, we do our best to correct it and if we see a fellow Muslim erring, we try to bring him back to the right and urge him to repent. However, we sometimes forget that the way of a righteous Muslim is that he does this with love and he hides the sins of others. We should always bear in mind that the Messenger of Allah said: “Whoever covers a Muslim’s (sins), Allah will cover him (his sins) in this world and in the Hereafter.” [Muslim] Are we so faultless that we can do away with this?

I’ve never forgotten Huda’s words – may Allah reward her with the best ameen – and was reminded of her advice to have a good opinion when I read this narration last weekend:

Imam Bukhari and Imam Muslim transmitted in their own Saheeh the hadeeth narrated by Abu Hurayrah radhiallahu `anhu that the Messenger of Allah said, “`Isa `alayhis salaam, the son of Maryam, saw a man stealing and asked him, ‘Did you steal?’ He said, ‘No, by Allah besides Whom there is no other god.’ So `Isa `alayhis salaam said, ‘I believe in Allah and contradict my eyes.'”