There are times when I wish ‘well-meaning’ people would just back off and stop trying to add value to my children’s education.
If you cannot impart knowledge to my kids in a positive and encouraging way, then please be so good as to recognise your shortcoming and leave them alone.
Please, before you start quizzing Ms M on the finer points of Geography, check that you can ask her questions without GRILLING her and making her feel as if a wrong answer would diminish her in your eyes. Please do not ask her to repeat things that you had taught her in front of company. She is not a performer and it is certainly not her job to validate you. She is learning and learning a lot each day, so I would appreciate it if you would not act as if there are numerous gaps that you need to fill on my behalf.
She loves you and I know you love her, but really, you must stop this.
[Lion image from Pexels]
Ukhtee, you sound stressed!
Please don’t people get to you. You know why your schooling your children at home and the best ways to teach them because they’re YOUR children. Don’t feel inadequate just because so-and-so thinks they know better!
Keep your head up and keep smiling **hug**.
May Allaah give you strength. Ameen.
:-)
assalamu alaykum, I understand how u feel… torn between protecting your child from esteem-lowering behaviour of some well-wisher and remaining respectful to that adult, perhaps… I go through this too… Just yesterday, at our monthly home-schooling get-together, I asked a lovely veteran home-schooling mum what to do if someone says in front of my child, “She can’t read?’ The sister advised, (roughly) “Hold your child close, and say with a smile: ‘In our family, we do things when we are ready for them… She walked when she was ready… Look how well she walks; she talked when she was ready… look how well she talks… She’ll read when she’s ready and then there’ll be nothing stopping her in sha Allah.”’ I know however, that in my culture, this can sometimes be difficult… I wouldn’t like to be rude to an older relative, for instance, so I’ll reassure my child that she’s just fine… After reading John Holt’s book… (kids learn by asking questions, not by answering them), I hardly ever ask my child questons to test her knowledge… We dont do this to adults, do we?
Sister erum, I totally love the advise you were given, mashaa`Allaah!
Assalamualaikum….take care, dear sister. My love, hugs & kisses to the babies. Pls email me. I’ve sent 2 emails but I didn’t get any reply….Love, pinkie.
Oh sister. I am so sorry. I can completely relate (well, not completely since I’m not homeschooling anymore). I have quite a few “well-wishers” who would be aching to do this to my son to see how well we were doing as a homeschooling family.
I feel for your children, too. We try our best to teach them that they will always be good enough and then others by careless actions and words (obviously not maliciously), make them think otherwise.
In one ear and out the other :P That’s the best way sometimes! Chin up girl!
aha… looks like a clear case of ‘livin in Pakistan’ to me