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The Bitter Homeschooler’s Wish List

March 10, 2008 by Imaan 2 Comments

These points are extracted from The Bitter Homeschooler’s Wish List (Secular Homeschooling Magazine, Issue #1).

  • Please stop asking us if it’s legal. If it is — and it is — it’s insulting to imply that we’re criminals. And if we were criminals, would we admit it?
  • Learn what the words “socialize” and “socialization” mean and use the one you really mean, instead of mixing them up the way you do now. Socializing means hanging out with other people for fun. Socialization means having acquired the skills necessary to do so successfully and pleasantly. If you’re talking to me and my kids, that means that we do in fact go outside now and then to visit the other human beings on the planet… and you can safely assume that we’ve got a decent grasp of both concepts.
  • Quit interrupting my kid at her dance lesson, scout meeting, choir practice, baseball game, art class, field trip, park day, music class, 4H club, or soccer lesson to ask her if, as a homeschooler, she ever gets to socialize.
  • Don’t assume that every homeschooler you meet is homeschooling for the same reasons and in the same way as that one homeschooler you know.
  • If that homeschooler you know is actually someone you saw on TV, either on the news or on a “reality” show, the above goes double.
  • Please stop telling us horror stories about the homeschoolers you know, know of, or think you might know who ruined their lives by homeschooling. You’re probably the same little bluebird of happiness whose hobby is running up to pregnant women and inducing premature labor by telling them every ghastly birth story you’ve ever heard. We all hate you, so please go away.
  • We don’t look horrified and start quizzing your kids when we hear they’re in public school. Please stop drilling our children like potential oil fields to see if we’re doing what you consider an adequate job of homeschooling.
  • We didn’t go through all the reading, learning, thinking, weighing of options, experimenting, and worrying that goes into homeschooling just to annoy you. Really. This was a deeply personal decision, tailored to the specifics of our family. Stop taking the bare fact of our being homeschoolers as either an affront or a judgment about your own educational decisions.
  • Please stop questioning my competence and demanding to see my credentials. I didn’t have to complete a course in catering to successfully cook dinner for my family; I don’t need a degree in teaching to educate my children. If spending at least twelve years in the kind of chew-it-up-and-spit-it-out educational facility we call public school left me with so little information in my memory banks that I can’t teach the basics of an elementary education to my nearest and dearest, maybe there’s a reason I’m so reluctant to send my child to school.
  • If my kid’s only six and you ask me with a straight face how I can possibly teach him what he’d learn in school, please understand that you’re calling me an idiot. Don’t act shocked if I decide to respond in kind.
  • Stop assuming that because the word “home” is right there in “homeschool,” we never leave the house. We’re the ones who go to the amusement parks, museums, and zoos in the middle of the week and in the off-season and laugh at you because you have to go on weekends and holidays when it’s crowded and icky.
  • Stop assuming that because the word “school” is right there in homeschool, we must sit around at a desk for six or eight hours every day, just like your kid does. Even if we’re into the “school” side of education — and many of us prefer a more organic approach — we can burn through a lot of material a lot more efficiently, because we don’t have to gear our lessons to the lowest common denominator.
  • Don’t ask my kid if she wouldn’t rather go to school unless you don’t mind if I ask your kid if he wouldn’t rather stay home and get some sleep now and then.
  • Stop saying, “Oh, I could never homeschool!” Even if you think it’s some kind of compliment, it sounds more like you’re horrified. One of these days, I won’t bother disagreeing with you any more.
  • If you can remember anything from chemistry or calculus class, you’re allowed to ask how we’ll teach these subjects to our kids. If you can’t, thank you for the reassurance that we couldn’t possibly do a worse job than your teachers did, and might even do a better one.
  • Stop asking about how hard it must be to be my child’s teacher as well as her parent. I don’t see much difference between bossing my kid around academically and bossing him around the way I do about everything else.
  • Stop saying that my kid is shy, outgoing, aggressive, anxious, quiet, boisterous, argumentative, pouty, fidgety, chatty, whiny, or loud because he’s homeschooled. It’s not fair that all the kids who go to school can be as annoying as they want to without being branded as representative of anything but childhood.
  • Quit assuming that my kid must be some kind of prodigy because she’s homeschooled.
  • Quit assuming that I must be some kind of prodigy because I homeschool my kids.
  • Quit assuming that I must be some kind of saint because I homeschool my kids.
  • Stop talking about all the great childhood memories my kids won’t get because they don’t go to school, unless you want me to start asking about all the not-so-great childhood memories you have because you went to school.
  • Here’s a thought: If you can’t say something nice about homeschooling, shut up!
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Yesterday, I had a sobering chat with my friend wh Yesterday, I had a sobering chat with my friend who is a member of a minority group here. (I am keeping things vague for her safety and mine.) She has a relative who is also a friend of mine. 

In both my early encounters with them, I’d always sensed an air of reserve and secrecy. I understood that we had different beliefs, but I could not understand what I perceived as fear. Not being a native here in Pakistan, I’d had my share of bewildering and unfathomable encounters, so I’d left things at that. Maybe I’d understand in time to come, I thought.

They had always been very kind to me and I tried to reciprocate as best I could. For all our (acknowledged) differences in opinion and belief, we found some common ground and focused on doing some good. My friend’s relative donated science kits as well as books for my homeschooling gang and I’ll always be grateful for that. 

I read news yesterday about how my friend and her people do in fact live in danger. She told me how she fears for her husband’s life every single time he leaves home. She jumps every single time her doorbell rings. She worries about sending her daughter to school for fear of bullying or worse… Target killings of her people are a reality.

It made me feel so ashamed because this is tragic and downright disgraceful for any country, but even more so for a Muslim one. 

It’s OK to disagree. It’s OK to debate. It is NOT OK to terrorize and it is NOT OK resort to violence. It is wrong and it is unjust and it is EVIL to do so. When dealing with people of different beliefs, can we not be civilised? Can we not be HUMAN? Can we not behave the way our deen taught us? 

We need to find a way to make things better. It is not right to allow people who know precious little about Islam to desecrate it. 

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#islam #minorityrights #knowyourreligion #pakistan
Journalists say this time it is different. Rushdi Journalists say this time it is different.

Rushdi as-Sarraj, Yasser Murtaja’s friend, told Al-Jazeera, “This task is difficult under normal circumstances, so you can imagine working under a fierce offensive that does not distinguish between a journalist, a civilian or a military leader.” Israel is working hard “to silence the image and voice, and to ban any news or information that exposes its crimes”.

He also says, “My family doesn’t stop calling me, fearing that I could be harmed. It is an endless circle of fear and exhaustion. But we must continue sharing our message.”

Praying for Muna El-Kurd @muna.kurd15 , her brother @mohammedelkurd and all the journalists putting out the truth. 

#palestine #freepalestine #freemunakurd #freemunaelkurd #savesheikhjarrah #savesilwan #savelifta #savemohammedelkurd
«THROWBACK, Summer + Winter 2019» «We returned «THROWBACK, Summer + Winter 2019»

«We returned to the park after the lockdown earlier this year… sadly our tree for all seasons is no more 😢»

FOREIGN LANDS by Robert Louis Stevenson
Up into the cherry tree
Who should climb but little me?
I held the trunk with both my hands
And looked abroad on foreign lands.
I saw the next door garden lie,
Adorned with flowers, before my eye,
And many pleasant places more
That I had never seen before.
If I could find a higher tree
Farther and farther I should see,
To where the grown-up river slips
Into the sea among the ships.
To where the roads on either hand
Lead onward into fairy land,
Where all the children dine at five,
And all the playthings come alive.
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#throwback #pakistan #islamabad #lifeinpakistan #lifeinislamabad #homeschool #homeschooldays #homeschoolcoop #homeschoolinislamabad #homeschoolinpakistan #naturediary #naturejournal #science #charlottemason #charlottemasoninspired #charlottemasoneducation #charlottemasonnaturestudy #charlottemasonliving #charlottemasonhomeschool #cmnaturestudy #cmnaturejournal #naturewalk #natureramble #naturestudy #naturejournal #homeeducation #outandabout #ilookisee #islamabadhomeschoolers
A couple of you asked me to make a post of my stor A couple of you asked me to make a post of my story in response to LV’s despicable use of the keffiyeh design. Pictures in this post are from hirbawi.ps and @palestine.pixel … 

EDIT: yes, my second slide should have been edited and it is bugging me. I repeated 1930s… sorry! If you want a more polished version, DM me. You get my meaning anyway, right? 
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#palestine #freepalestine #keffiyeh #gaza #jerusalem #savesheikhjarrah
«YET ANOTHER THROWBACK, Jan. 2020» I was feelin «YET ANOTHER THROWBACK, Jan. 2020»

I was feeling a little out of sorts (again) – I’d left the house a mess (again) and the boy and I were in a rush to get to the Art Co-op. Habiba @ourlivinghomeschool was doing a session on Wassily Kandinsky that day. 

We were delayed by a massive traffic jam and our stress levels rocketed when an obnoxious motorist kept sounding his horn repeatedly as if to shoo other cars out of the way. What was everyone else to do but wait for the jam to ease? 

We made it just in time though…barely! As we ran towards the gathering, it was as if a huge weight was lifted away. This gorgeous view greeted the boy and me, alhamdulillah. When we got down to studying Kandinsky, we felt more than fine.

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#pakistan #islamabad #lifeinpakistan #lifeinislamabad #homeschool #homeschooldays #homeschoolcoop #homeschoolinislamabad #homeschoolinpakistan #naturediary #desidiaries #charlottemason #charlottemasoninspired #charlottemasoneducation #charlottemasonnaturestudy #charlottemasonliving #charlottemasonhomeschool #cmnaturestudy #cmnaturejournal #naturewalk #natureramble #naturestudy #naturejournal #homeeducation #outandabout #ilookisee #islamabadhomeschoolers #artcoop #artoutdoors
«THROWBACK, Mar. 2019» Once upon a time before «THROWBACK, Mar. 2019» 
Once upon a time before Covid.

The calm before…

We had our Monday meet up again at Fatima Jinnah Park. The air was cool and crisp and the skies sunny when the nature gang got together. Then, it was on to a jolly game of Simon Says – Katelynn’s @_k8erpotater clever way of teaching the kids about body parts and how they move.

The kids did their usual tree climbing and exploring. Then, the dark clouds started rolling in. We took a while to decide whether or not to leave – the park literally looked dark and ominous on one side and cheery and bright on the other. We only started rushing for home when lightning split the sky. The kids were not to be hurried, however. They felt little pellets hitting them and stopped to investigate… hailstones!

Our ramble was cut short and I got cold and wet, but I think it was a gorgeous day. We got to learn about nature in a very real way.
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#pakistan #islamabad #lifeinpakistan #lifeinislamabad #homeschool #homeschooldays #homeschoolcoop #homeschoolinislamabad #homeschoolinpakistan #naturediary #naturejournal #science #charlottemason #charlottemasoninspired #charlottemasoneducation #charlottemasonnaturestudy #charlottemasonliving #charlottemasonhomeschool #cmnaturestudy #cmnaturejournal #naturewalk #natureramble #naturestudy #naturejournal #homeeducation #outandabout #ilookisee #islamabadhomeschoolers
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