Good things come in little packages :)

Alhamdulillah, this little guy is now the newest member of our student body. Little `Isa aka Peep was born in late January and he’s kept us all busy, dizzy and in a tizzy!

We’ll be back to our regular programming pretty soon in shaa Allah :) In the meantime, I hope you’re all having happy, sunshiney days!

I come from a dual-income family – my mother was a nurse who worked shifts and my father was an Assistant Commissioner of Public Health in Singapore. During early childhood, my siblings and I had a helper who took care of us when my parents were at work and in later years, we became latch-key children when the much-loved nanny left to start her own family. It was inevitable, due to their work commitments and our school schedules, that we would often be left to our own devices.

I did not mind being independent, but I always had the feeling that there was something missing in our lives…

I do not blame my parents in the least – they had done the very best they could. They grew up during the Japanese Occupation and tightened their belts in the difficult post-war years. Their personal aspirations had to be shelved for more pressing considerations. When they had my siblings and me, they made sacrifices so we could have choices.

I believe my parents’ hard work and esteem for knowledge opened up horizons to me alhamdulillah and gave me the opportunity to choose homeschooling for my children.

It has been an exhilarating journey that has enriched us as a family. My husband and I love having Mars and Bear with us every day. We are their confidants and they are each others’ best friends. We have also been able to train them to take responsibility in our household’s daily operation. The girls have learnt to tackle laundry duty, meal-time preparations as well as cleaning and tidying daily. Alhamdulillah, homeschooling has enabled us to work as a team.

Homeschooling has allowed us to maintain close ties with our family. Whether we were based in Singapore or Pakistan, we have been able to make decisions to meet our children’s and family’s needs, without having to worry about school policy and classroom schedules. We were able to be with my father-in-law during his last days and were able to comfort my ailing mother during her kidney treatments and surgeries this year. It has been a blessing indeed that we have always been to make family – rather than school – a priority.

Our children are treated as unique individuals – their strengths are celebrated and honed and their struggles, identified and worked on with love and due consideration. The one-on-one attention they each receive enables them to get through their material in greater breadth and depth. They set their own rhythm, but rather than create indiscipline or inertia, this has made the learning more efficient and given them more time for other pursuits and interests.

Homeschooling has also given us the freedom to choose our preferred approach and resources. At our home, we focus on knowledge and good behaviour rather than on grades. Credit is given not for cleverness, but for good conduct. We encourage striving, but not for self-glorification and competition is tempered with compassion for our fellow learners.

The best thing about homeschooling is that my husband and I have been able to impart and incorporate Islamic morals to our children without compromise. Our faith is interwoven in our curriculum so our children have no need to leave their values at the school gates, set aside their worship or downplay their Muslim identity. Home education has given them a stronger sense of character and self-esteem. They have been sheltered from the bullying, teasing and negative peer pressure that is common in public schools.

A few months ago, a sister I met marvelled at the fact that I am a homeschooling mother. She declared, “I could never do what you do!” I assured her that it has neither been a sacrifice nor a great feat on my part. Being with my children has helped me find what was missing before – joy in togetherness and faith.

I thank Allah every day, for I have learnt more than I have taught and truly taken more than I have given.

This article was originally written for HomeWorks Magazine.

(Image from Pexels.Com)

NOT what our home looks like … haha…

The rowdy ruffians have been buckling down to more book learning these days and alhamdulillah, we’ve covered quite a bit of ground. I’ve told them to work on their weak areas especially – Math for Marz and reading for Bear. I’d thought that they would rail against the stricter schedule, given that we’d slowed down a bit in the last couple of months, but ma shaa Allah, they’ve been tremendously good sports about it.

We’ve had many disruptions to our days – there are always so many frustrations when you live in an older home long in need of repairs. There was a time when our walls and ceilings had to be sanded and everything – I kid you not, EVERYTHING – was covered in a fine powder that took weeks to clean. Then, there were the leaks from pipes in mysterious locations – plumbers came in and out breaking through walls only to find their diagnosis in error. Meanwhile, the glass extension which we had had such hopes for continued to disappoint by letting in rain.

Our small living area was cluttered beyond belief. It seemed that we just could not get a handle on things and there were days when we felt like screaming our lungs out and throwing the towel in. We were anxious to get back to our home schooling. What we didn’t realise though was that our home was schooling us :)

When things settled down and we had to begin the slow process of cleaning and putting everything back in, we became reacquainted with our possessions. We learnt that we had inherited, purchased and clung on to many things that were simply not enhancing our lives. Alhamdulillah, the experience had taught us not to buy anything heedlessly and to give freely what others could use, rather than hang on to them for sentimental reasons. Truly, we don’t need as much as we think we do!

We’ve learnt as well that things don’t always go to plan – in fact, they often go wrong! – and that, really, is alright. We have to learn to just grit our teeth and be patient.

We’ve learnt that we do need others and it isn’t a bad thing. Most of all, we need Allah and we need to trust in Him. It’s funny, but our numerous botched plans have actually taught us to be at peace. We would do well to remember the hadeeth in which Rasulullah sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam said, “How amazing is the affair of the Muslim! His affairs are all good. If he experiences ease, he is grateful, and that is good for him. If he experiences hardship, he faces it with patience and perseverance, and that is also good for him.” (Muslim)

Qadr Allah wa ma shaa fa`al. Alhamdulillah `alaa kulli haal.

There is a saying, “All good things come to those who wait.” I think we can and will hold out a little longer, in shaa Allah.

The learning? Well, it continues alhamdulillah… :)

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The rowdy ruffians are positively addicted to cooking these days. It is true that the stove gives comforting warmth that my tropical offspring miss. However, they also enjoy the process itself and it pleases them to no end to see others appreciating their concoctions. The other day, Bear made applesauce and Mars prepared her specialty – omelette with homegrown garlic sprouts – for a guest’s breakfast.

I remember one of the girls’ early culinary attempts. They decided, one day, to make their own lunch and conspired gleefully in the kitchen. They later invited me to sample their meal – I’d thought it was something elaborate or out of the ordinary considering their blissful expressions, but I was mistaken. It turned out to be a simple dish of boiled potatoes seasoned with butter, salt and pepper. :) It was delicious though – one of those things that just hit the spot, you know? – and quite healthful and it made me realise that I had a lot to learn from my children. One of the most important things that they have taught me is to find joy and contentment in the littlest things. Indeed, when it comes to food, frugal and easy need not mean compromising on flavour or quality.

I’ve been inspired by Kate’s blog (she has tips on frugal living and back-to-basic meals), discussions with my friend Tea (you guys MUST pester her to blog about the amazing things she has learnt about healthful eating!) and meals my friend Umm Aymun prepares (she makes the simplest things so mouthwatering that it is amazing, I kid you not! These Urdu-speaking folk have close to magical talents!). We’ve made a conscious effort to eat more home cooked meals and to use more organic foods. We are fortunate in this respect – raw milk, pure butter/ghee, free range eggs and organic meats and produce are more easily available and affordable here than in my home country.

We have been enjoying making hearty meals that require minimal ingredients and preparation. I’m not against elaborate meals – it is a blessing to present the best to your family and guests – but it simply is not something sustainable or even necessary on a daily basis. Eating simply can mean savings that can be used for more useful things and charity. It also inculcates self-restraint – all too often, we indulge our nafs and throw moderation to the wind. We would do well to be the sort of people who can make do, people who know the difference between “needs” and “wants”. The Prophet sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam said, “A human being has not filled any vessel which is worse than a belly. Enough for the son of Adam are some mouthfuls that can keep his back straight, but if there is no escape, he should fill it a third with food, a third with drink and a third empty.” [at-Tirmidhi]

For us, easy meals allow us all to be involved in the preparation. The girls feel a great sense of participation and achievement. What is more, not slaving over the stove means that we have more time for reading, crafting and of course, worship. I’ve begun a little notebook of easy-peasy recipes for the girls that I’ve stuck onto the refridgerator door – they can refer to it any time they feel like cooking in shaa Allah.

We’ve been having lots of fruit and vegetables. Pomegranates are a favourite – they are so gorgeous truly! Lunches are often our version of Subs – sandwiches of lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, capsicum and cottage cheese with little dollops of mayo and mustard – they are so appetizing ma shaa Allah. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, nothing beats the taste of produce here – they are so fresh and the flavours just burst in your mouth.

Here are some other dishes we’ve been doing recently…

We revisited Mars’ baked pasta… this time with minced beef … with only five ingredients and 3 pairs of hands working on it, it took less than half and hour to make…

… made a 20-minute curry… one of those chuck-everything-in-the-pot-and-let-it-stew dishes this haphazard housewife likes…

… a variation of my children’s potato dish … boiled potatoes cooked with onions, garlic and minced chicken, seasoned with salt and pepper. I used the kids’ homegrown garlic sprouts to garnish and they were delighted! Another 20-minute dish that was much appreciated, alhamdulillah…

… we have cut down on fried foods so these are becoming a rarity (honest, Tea!)… I made my version of pakoras as we had left-over bread and crusts. I just chucked them all in a bowl with flour, eggs, onions, coriander and spring onion greens and spices and fried the crazy mix up :)

It will be a busy week – the kids have to hit the books and I have to tidy our living area once again – a mammoth task, believe you me! I hope it also means another week of simple pleasures… in shaa Allah :)

I was born and bred in Singapore and I am pretty much a tropical weather sort of person. I like bright sunny days, balmy breezes and the occasional rain. I am accustomed to comfortable, light clothing and being able to eat ice-cream any time I want.

When I was growing up as a child, I was curious about other seasons, particularly winter. I’d seen pictures and movies showing how beautiful – and fun! – snow can be, so I was quite pleased when I finally had my chance to experience it for myself. I moved to the USA shortly after my wedding with my husband, who was completing his studies. I remember it was early January when we landed in Chicago in 2001. My brother-in-law was there to meet us and his first words to me were, “As salaamu `alaykum … Welcome to America.” He then promptly handed his brother and me mufflers to wear. I thought then, how odd of him, but within minutes, I could feel the wind, so cold that it felt like angry little pin pricks all over my skin. Needless to say, I felt a great deal of trepidation.

Before driving to Indiana, where we were staying, my husband thought it would be nice for me to take a look-see around Chicago. Now, the only images I’d had of winter in the US were of the freshly fallen variety… of breathtaking landscapes and of children delighted at play. Let’s just say that Chicago cured me of my fanciful notions :P That day, I saw only grey sludge and people looking miserable as walked briskly, hands in pockets, trying to stay warm. Still, winter in the US was rather easy to bear on the whole – there was central heating after all… and I did get my fill of pretty winter scenes later on when we moved to Wisconsin :) Nevertheless, I would ALWAYS rejoice when warmer weather beckoned.

When we moved to Pakistan, my hatred for winter reached its peak. It had partly to do with difficulties in leaving my own home country. I would grumble about all the layers of clothes we had to wear and wash (there isn’t central heating here), the dull and dreary days punctuated by heavy rains (forget freshly driven snow!), the mess of blankets and duvets and what not and just the general discomfort that the cold brought.

I’ve begun to soften my stance towards winter though – I admit, I can be a stubborn wretch :) It’s peevish and petty to rail against change and to complain about how painful the cold is when I have a more than adequate roof over my head. Others have not and even have to brave the elements to eke out a living. This dry country which is very much dependent on its agriculture also needs the winter rains.

“And We send down from the sky rain charted with blessing, and We produce therewith gardens and grain for harvests…” (Surah Qaf 50:9)

I’ve begun to appreciate so much about this season and the blessings it brings. My daughters and I did a lovely lesson about how the Salaf viewed winter. We were were bundled up under our blankets after Fajr that day :) It gave us a totally new attitude towards winter alhamdulillah. (You can read the article here.)

Al-Hassan Al-Basri for example said: “How good winter is for the believer! Its night is long, so he prays in it; and its day is short, so he observes fasting in it.” Indeed, the the Prophet sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam said: “The cold booty is observing fast in winter.” (at-Tirmidhi) How easy it is to fast in winters because we don’t feel the thirst and lethargy of the hot summers.

I love Ibn Rajab’s words about winter – “Winter is considered the spring of the believer, because he revels in the orchards of obedience and goes in the fields of worship and his heart having the pleasure of strolling in the gardens of deeds which are easy during winter.”

I’m going to brew myself a cup of tea and sit by the window now to stitch. I’ll probably put on a lecture to listen to and get some soul food, in shaa Allah. It is cold, but the sky is clear … alhamdulillah. For all my friends out there experiencing winter, I hope you are enjoying it in all its goodness :)

(Image from Pexels)